For the first sixteen years of my life I went by my given name, Robert, unless I had drawn the ire of my mom then I was “Robert Bucklin Black Jr.!” Sure, there was that long summer in 9th grade when the neighborhood kids called me Bert or Birdy, but it was simple. I was Robert. Upon moving to California my senior year of high school the Cali kids, whether due to laziness or in the spirit of California laid-backness, called me Rob. It stuck and other than situations where I have to use my legal name, or called by my mother, I’ve been Rob.

In life you are introduced to thousands of people in hundreds of different circumstances. I’m not good with names so I get people forgetting my name. Or calling me the wrong name. “Chris?” “No, Rob.” I get it, we all forget. What I never understand is introducing myself and the person I’m introducing myself to immediately calling me the wrong name. It happens more than you would think and there are two names I get called the most.

One is Rod. Ok, I get that it sounds close to Rob. But here’s the thing, although I have heard of famous Rod’s: Rod Stewart, Rod Carew, Rod Sterling, and Rod Laver come to mind, I have never personally met a Rod (stop doing the Butthead laugh). I don’t know why that name comes to mind to some people before Rob. In any case, it’s the rarer of the two mistakes. No big deal,  I move on.

The second one occurs more frequently;  Ron. I hate this. I’m tired of this. How do you get Ron from Rob? It happens all the time and I can’t take it anymore. I usually let it slide but no more. The straw that broke the camel’s hump? In an email a few days ago I sent someone the needed information and he replied “Thanks Ron!” My signature is in every email I send and it clearly says Thanks, Rob Black. It happened in writing!!!

A sales person did it recently. He asked “What’s your name?” as he shook my hand. I replied “Rob” and he starts “Okay Ron, here’s what we’re going to do.” NO, we won’t be doing anything. At my last job I went by Robert more than Rob and there was still one customer who constantly called me Ron. I would help him out, he would say “Have a good one Ron,” and I’d stew around for the rest of the day. Why should I stew? No offense to the Rons out there, if you get called Rob I feel your pain.

But no more! You will stand corrected. Stood corrected? Standedly corrected? You will be stoodly corrected by me! Anyways, I will correct you. I am Rob, or Robert, or the tall bearded dude, or the guy with the funny Bucklin blog but no more will I be called Ron and let it pass. Nada. Nyet! None shall pass. Nay, I say, and all those other funny sayings in the negative.

Thanks,

Rob Black